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| Oh Lord... |
So, I struggled. 6 weeks of painful, self-inflicted mind
games and loads of bullshit. My body was out of whack, my mind followed, and my
focus seemed non-existent. I spent that time going through the motions. (Albeit
important, load bearing, fat burning motions…but in a heartless and gutless
manner, it seemed.)
*NEWS FLASH*
I’M BACK, BITCHES!
I have reached a whole new stage of the game. I am 6.5 weeks
from show date, and much has happened and still needs to happen to make this
whole thing a success. So we’ll start with history, and move on to the future.
The Happened:
I got my posing suit
– I bought it used, online from divaexchange.com. You would think you could
just bedazzle any bikini, but no. This shit is expensive and important! You
need your suit to fit properly to show off and accentuate your build. I found
someone with similar specs (140+lbs, A cup) who was selling a suit that was an
interesting color. It has an atrocious rhinestone bow, but that will be
replaced by something way more hardcore. (Or nothing)
|
| Oh Lord... |
I had a great pinch
– I went to see a different trainer to have my fat pinched. It came out really
well. I was in the 16%...and I walked away thinking I could do it! Eight to
nine more percentage points in 8 weeks, no problem! I emailed the lovely lady
who has been helping with my program and got some new instructions.
I had a heartbreaking
pinch – I went to see my normal pinch man. He pinched me, and said I gained
2% compared to what had been taken the week before, and gained .5% from what
had been taken 6 weeks before that. I looked in the mirror, compared progress
and thought, “No fucking way.” It was disheartening, and confusing as fuck! I
wasn’t sure what to do. I emailed my trainer and she said there are multiple
reasons it could have read that way (water retention, different pincher, etc…)
I didn’t feel much better, but it may have been the straw that ripped my head
out of my ass…or wait…something about a camel’s back? IDK.
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| No Progress? I Call BULLSHIT! |
AND THEN…Monday
June 3, 2013…A day like any other…Well, it seemed that way. I woke up, did
cardio at 5:30…Stairmaster for 48 minutes. Went to work, paid 100s of people
1,000s of dollars, and then ran out of there and headed to 24 Hour Fitness in
Tualatin.
Sidebar: I love 24 Hour Fitness in
Tualatin. The employees are awesome, the clientele is generally of a good sort,
and I see the same folks in there all the time. Granted, no one is kicking
their own ass as hard as I kick mine, but most of these folks do a good job.
Monday, always legs and abs. I have an issue with rest; I
hate doing it. I super set everything, why can’t weights be cardio? They can,
and I make it so.
I killed it. Hit all 4 sets of 10 back squats at 135, hit
the abs hard, added split squats at 80lbs, and crushed every. single. exercise.
I was sweating everywhere, hair absolutely dreaded and dripping, listening to
my favorite pop punk band (to whose concert I was going to that night!) It was
one of the best most magical workouts in my memory. It. Was. AWESOME.
I went home, took a shower, put on shorts and a tank top, and
left for the concert. I don’t normally participate very physically in
concerts…but I jumped, I clapped, I shoved…I threw my arms up and yelled…and I
sweated. I thought I had sweated all of the sweat during my work out…I had not!
I was soaked, drenched, needed another shower! It was so freeing and awesome. I
didn’t give a fuck about what was going on around me, just enjoyed every
minute. It was weirdly freeing; akin to how I usually feel after a muddy trail
run on a rainy fall day.
That was a silly and long story, but that was the turning
point from my ridiculous funk and into the final 7 week stretch to the
competition. I have a fire and a focus; I’m in love with it. I no longer
workout, I only RAGE. I cannot be out worked. This week I upped my back squat
to 145. (DID IT! All without failing, so next week…MORE WEIGHTS) I sweated so
much on Monday, I could have done laundry in my puddle of sweat. Tuesday was
chest and back…
Now, let me tell you about chest and back. My chest looks
amazing. I have been throwing up 95lbs on all barbell benches (Flat, Incline,
Decline) for a few weeks, I need to up it next week. I am strong! And
then…there’s my back. Back exercise bore me. You can’t see what’s happening,
half of them I just feel like I’m flopping and flailing about like a half
squished bug. Lat pulls, bent row, posterior raise, cable row…LAME. LAME. LAME.
I have been trying to do pull-ups…I can do 6 narrow grips. (4 sets) I struggle
with grip strength, and that stupid tapered bar they have at the gym…can’t they
just have a normal fucking bar? I’ll continue to work on the pull-ups. Practice
makes perfect.
I got my plane
tickets – I have been watching airfare for a few weeks now…hoping it would
go down…I watched it go up…and I got nervous, very nervous. Then I started
searching and hunting and abandoning my fantasy of flying non-stop Southwest
for cheap…So I am on some Red-Eye flights that will maximize my time in Austin,
and minimize my time away from work. (Genius, I am; Tired, I will be) Other
accommodations will be shared, hotels, rental cars etc…
I registered for THE
SHOW – I registered with the governing body and received my amateur
competitor card, registered for the Naturally Fit Super Show, and associated
Polygraph Test. I even scheduled my spray tan and suit gluing…cuz that thing
ain’t gonna stay out of my ass on its own.
I was videotaped
while chatting about food and such – Burning Hearts Media created a sweet
video with an awesome 30 minute presentation about Athletes and Plant Based
Nutrition by Matt Ruscigno, a peak at his project called “A Day in the Life of
a Vegan Athlete,” and then 30 minutes of Q&A featuring several vegan
athletes, including Pro Cyclist Jack Lindquist, Pro Cyclist Zak Kovalcik, BodyBuilder Ed Bauer, and little ‘ol me…So, there was that.
The Happening:
My Brother is gone
– For 3 weeks my brother is out of town. I cleaned up the house a bit, and I
feel so much better. There is no sailing on Tuesdays, so I can focus on my
workouts, but I miss him dearly on Thursdays for J24 racing. We blasted through
a rough patch and have been spending more time together. It feels good. I hate
his mess, but I miss him.
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| I forgot I had this... |
The Thistle is Ready
– I didn’t have much to do with it…but upgrades have been made to the Thistle.
There will be camping and weekend sailing at fun lakes. Hopefully we can keep
it upright…or not.
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| Basically my one contribution...Hiking Straps... |
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| Oh I made smoothies...We had to eat... |
My Face – So my
face has gradually been looking better and better. The occurrence of insane
breakouts and total hideousness seems to have passed. I have lots of healing to
do, but I am much happier now with what is going on. I only Monday began taking
some pills to jumpstart the healing and elimination, it will be a 3 month cycle
that will, hopefully, be followed up by clear and healed skin. Someday maybe
I’ll be normal looking again, but for now I’ll celebrate the fact that my face
doesn’t hurt or itch.
My Body – I have
much left to do. Here are some photos of me in my suit. It is so not me; it makes
my back look like I am lying in a hammock and accentuates the hugely whiteness
of my wide ass. Much more to do and 6 weeks in which to do it.
 |
| Post workout, post dinner, no shower...sorry folks...Haha. |
The Gonnas:
Spray Tan – As
scary as standing on a stage nearly naked wearing 5’ heels will be, the
scariest part is getting a spray tan. I am going to look terrible in person,
but on stage I will look awesome. I imagine it will look something like this...
5 Inch Heels – I
have to wear clear 5 inchers…I need to get them and start practicing. YIKES! It
will be easier to tip me over than a Thistle in 20 knots of breeze.
Keep on KILLING IT!
– That doesn’t sound very Vegan! I am committed to my workouts; I am committed
to my cardio. I have said no and turned down offers for things that I want to
do b/c I know I need rest, and to focus. I have a REALLY hard time telling
people no. I want to make people happy, and I want to have fun…but I know what
my priority is right now, and I have to stick to the list. As fun as those
things might have been, I know I made the right choices. I need to keep on my
diet plan and take constant readings for my body composition. I need to take
time to practice posing…smiling and breathing through my mouth…looking natural
while flexing every muscle in my body…sound easy? IT IS NOT!
In the end I will have spent about 7 months training, and
dieting to get to a specific point. I will be proud to represent the work I
have done, the time and effort donated to me by a friend from college, and the
folks who spent time organizing the team. I will be ecstatic to encounter my
teammates whom I have yet to meet face to face! I am talking about 15-20 people
who have supported me via e-mail, Instagram, Facebook, and Text. It is awesome
to be a part of a community like this.
This opportunity is also another form of activism for me.
This will be yet another chance to stand up for animal rights, to bring to
light the injustice of our speciesist society, and prove that a life without
contributing to the death and suffering of this planet’s creatures is possible,
and right. It is a blessing to be able to blend my interests and I am anxious to
see how I can do it in the future.
Huge shout out to the people who have listened to me bitch
and complain, my sister who has been forced to take 100s of awkward photos of
me, one of my best friends who spends time in the gym with me and eats (and rarely complains) the
sloppy piles of uncontained vegetables that make up my meals, the strangers who
compliment my progress, and all of the other Facebook Friends, and followers out there who are
supporting what I am doing. This has been a huge undertaking, but it has
created and provided an immovable foundation for my future as an athlete.
I killed it. Hit all 4 sets of 10 back squats at 135, hit
the abs hard, added split squats at 80lbs, and crushed every. single. exercise.
I was sweating everywhere, hair absolutely dreaded and dripping, listening to
my favorite pop punk band (to whose concert I was going to that night!) It was
one of the best most magical workouts in my memory. It. Was. AWESOME. 
My Face – So my
face has gradually been looking better and better. The occurrence of insane
breakouts and total hideousness seems to have passed. I have lots of healing to
do, but I am much happier now with what is going on. I only Monday began taking
some pills to jumpstart the healing and elimination, it will be a 3 month cycle
that will, hopefully, be followed up by clear and healed skin. Someday maybe
I’ll be normal looking again, but for now I’ll celebrate the fact that my face
doesn’t hurt or itch. 
Spray Tan – As
scary as standing on a stage nearly naked wearing 5’ heels will be, the
scariest part is getting a spray tan. I am going to look terrible in person,
but on stage I will look awesome. I imagine it will look something like this...
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